Sunday, May 22, 2005

Start flirting !!

For Females:

Usually the first contact made with a "Potentially Interesting Person" (from this point forward they will be referred to as "PIPs") is eye contact. There are a few different types of eye contact.There is the "Across the Room" eye contact, the "In Passing" eye contact (when a PIP is passing by you) and the all-important "Conversational" eye contact. Each is different in many respects, but similar in that they are all ways of sneaking in communication without words.

In order for that contact to have the desired impact, it must be delivered well. It is fun and easy when you know how. Perfecting this ability will be incredibly useful for you in meeting and attracting quality men! So you're at the 7-Eleven, a restaurant or club, the market or any public place where you see a PIP. How do you get from hmmm?. . . TO HIM! Often in these situations, you'll need to make eye contact before a conversation can begin.When making this kind of eye contact, remember that you are trying to convey a message with your eyes. People have told me that they are no good at eye-contact flirting because they always end up looking away - when really, this action is in fact conveying the desired message.

Think about it. If a man stares at you and when you look back at him he doesn't end up looking away, you feel uncomfortable and intimidated - more like you're being stalked than flirted with! A man will also feel uncomfortable if a woman overstays her gaze.

The ideal "Across the Room" eye-contact flirt only makes contact for two or three seconds, and then shyly, must turn away. Usually this will make you smile, which is again a perfect communication - friendly and pleasant. It shows you're happy that he looked back and showed interest in you. Even blushing works in your favor, so don't try to hide it. In these ways, you are using your nervous energy to your advantage. It's important that you let him catch you looking back at him. Subconsciously, this tells him you are interested. If he doesn't catch you looking back at him, he may decide you are not interested. Then he may not be able to get up the nerve to come over and start a conversation with you.

Side note: If he's looking at you when you look back at him, that's a pretty good sign he is interested in you. If he isn't looking at you, that's not necessarily a sign that he's not interested in you. In a situation where you have the time, this entire sequence of looking, looking away and looking back, should repeat itself a few times before you move forward. This kind of eye-contact flirting is most effective in a restaurant, club, or in line at an amusement park or the DMV. Use it in any situation where you and the PIP are going to be in the same place for a while.

GIRLS only!!!

How to tell if he likes you (and if he's flirting with you in his special own guy-way).
A lot depends on the type of guy and his individual personality.Shy GuysThese are tough to crack sometimes...
He'll look at you, until you turn around, then boom, he's looking the other way. You may 'feel' like he's watching you - but he's hard to catch at it
He may do something physical - like grab you in a play way, poke you, play with your hair... (Remember when you were really young and the guy you liked punched you or tackled you?)
He may be working really hard to pay attention to you, but doesn't quite know how...
He may ask a friend of yours about you - he'll say it's just for "friend of mine" that wants to know about you. He talks to everybody else - but when you're around he turns silent, or chokes up. You seem to accidentally bump into him a lot of different places.
He may not say a word to you, but he shows up in the same line, at the same movie, etc.
He'll give you a little smile from across the room, but if you get near, he won't look up. Basically - the BIG clue is that his behavior changes when you're around (compared to when he's around his buds or other girls). DEAD Giveaway - when you talk to him he turns red. (Bingo - you can pack that puppy up and take him home...)


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